Autor Tópico: [Fanfic 4, cap. 11] Loyalty, Honor etc - Cotion of Ponfusion, Booster  (Lida 1111 vezes)

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Offline Luinwen

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Thorin was getting impatient with the slow pace of the moon. He was eager to read the hidden signs in the map and then hit the road again, but there was also a good feeling in staying at just one place, and he wondered how it would be like to settle down at Erebor and grow a family, like his sister did at Ered Luin. But then he would have to have someone at his side to grow a family with, wasn’t it so? Then, why to wait? Fíli was finding his way into settling down with someone, and he was so much younger, why couldn’t he?
He could ask her. She was not used to dwarven ways, she didn’t know it was the woman who chose the man, he could ask her. The worst that could happen was if she said “no”, and then he would have his heart broken to pieces, but he could try again until she said “yes”. One of the good things about being a dwarf was that none thought it strange of one insisting on a matter until getting it settled. After all, he was being the most respectful and protective he could, making it clear to her that he thought of her as his jewel, and to the others that that jewel was found by him alone and that he would keep her faraway from any greedy looks.
Anyway, he could seek for counsel with Balin, who was not married but was his best advisor. Thorin just didn’t know how to explain what he was thinking without actually saying who was the one he was interested in, as there was no other dwarf woman in a hundred miles range or more. Maybe he could approach the matter in a philosophical way, but then most probably Balin would ask him what he was babbling about and demand him to speak clearly.
His flow of thoughts was interrupted by Kíli, who approached him gingerly with his sheepishly smile in his face. What was wrong with his nephews that day?
“Having a nice day, Uncle?”
The mature dwarf looked at his nephew thinking what in Durin’s name he meant with that.
“Now that you mention it…”
“Uncle, I’m so happy that you agreed to all that Fíli told you this morning…”  Thorin got a feeling that somehow he would regret things sooner than he thought of. “That I’ve come to thank you for being really moved to allow our family to grow from now on.”
“What a weird talk, lad, just spurt it out like your brother did this morning, would you?”
Kíli muffled down.
“Sorry, Uncle, it is that sometimes you seem to be so angry at her that I thought you really didn’t approve her in our Company at all.”
Thorin thought if the one he was just wondering about understood the real meaning of his feigning being angry at her. Was he being so harsh to Lily to show his strong feelings that he might be misunderstood? She was not born dwarf, after all. And now his nephew was talking about what, actually?
“What do you mean, son?”
Kíli stared down, but uplifted his eyes as he spoke.
“You treat her so harsh sometimes, that anyone would think you don’t like her, Uncle. I am sorry to say. But I’ll be bold enough to say that I don’t care, and that I’m in love with her nevertheless!”
“You what?” Thorin was out of himself, but Kíli held his step.
“I’m in love with her, no matter what you think about her.” Kíli was bold now, he did hold it back for too long. “We are spending lots of time together, and we treasure every moment and every passing day together, Uncle Thorin, you cannot imagine what it is like to be with her, she is really special, she is not like any other girl I’ve known, she approves who I am, and I don’t care if you put her to her edge, she is strong enough to bear it with no complain, and so will be I!”
Thorin shook his head in disbelief. Was he really being so harsh at her that it got beyond the borders of what was caring to what was abusing? And she found solace in his nephew and they fell in love? Then, he himself had put Lily to train with Kíli, what would he expect? She was young, younger than Kíli, and he was an old grumpy dwarf that would never satisfy her need for people of her age, to say the least. He bowed his head, heavy hearted.
“You are right. I will not interfere. It doesn’t matter what I feel for her, I have treated her too harsh and I deserve to be left to myself. You are young, you and your brother are the future of Erebor, I’m only an old dwarf with a heavy burden on me. I should not think of throwing this burden on the shoulders of one so young. For the much we have… spoken to each other… I know she is one to make your days brighter and… to ease the burden of being responsible for a people.”
Kíli wondered how his uncle did know so much about Ellen, and what he meant by “what he felt for her”, but kept it to himself. Thorin rambled on.
“I will… I will not feign training her anymore…” Feigning? He almost killed her each morning! “You can keep her beside you every afternoon, when I used to walk with her in the courtyards and argue about… so many things…”
To walk beside her every afternoon? How, if they spent the afternoons in the forge?
“Uncle… Thorin…”
The brokenhearted dwarf looked up at his nephew.
“Who, in Durin’s name, Uncle, are you talking about?”


Thorin was beside himself out of joy but also out of rage. The joy was that Kíli was not interested in Lily at all, and gave him some hints nor Balin, being more experienced, nor Glóin, being the only one married in the whole Company, would have means to give him.
The rage was because he would never ever even consider an elf as part of his family. It didn’t matter what he said to Fíli that very morning, no elf would never ever step on the high halls of Erebor, not even over his own corpse.
But Kíli was willing to question his uncle and king, and mentioned some words Thorin said earlier.
“Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thrór, head-dwarf of Durin’s line, first in the heart of Mahal, I swear by the Arkenstone that I will never compromise to anyone improper to Erebor’s halls, and that anyone compromised to me will be loyal to our people, honoring our traditions and none of the sons of Mahal will ever be ashamed by her!”
“This is what I expect from an heir to Durin’s line, and this means no elf will ever be this one.”
“Come on, Uncle, she is not a regular elf, an ordinary elf, she was not even born elf by the way, she was human until some days ago!”
“This is what Gandalf says, but he also believes these three ladies have changed into what their hearts belong to, so, mind you, in her core she is an elf.”
“But not in her history!”
Thorin looked at him side eyed.
“What do you mean?”
“She is not born to Gondolin people, nor to Thranduil’s folk; she is not related to any other elven people from Middle-Earth nor from Valinor. Ellen is not one of them, none of her kin has ever done something wrong to our people. You cannot blame her for other folks’ faults, nor for being what she is!”
“You can never trust an elf.”


Ellen didn’t have the slightest idea that things were so complicated among dwarves, although she knew Thorin was not the best mooded person at her. She gained his respect for her skills, but being an elf there was always something she did or said that disgusted him, and they argued every morning, before, during or after the training. Most of the days, before, during and after the morning trainings. She already had a notion that it was due to them being far too similar, both of them were used to lead people, and forgot what it was to be leaded. She at least was used to deal with formal hierarchy even when a director had this position only because of politics and not out of meritocracy, having learnt to swallow her pride in those circumstances, but Thorin was far too competitive for her to deal with that. He didn’t have to compete with her, he was king over his people, anyway, but she felt he had to prove himself above any other person, or, better, above any elf in his company, and that meant her. She could not risk the chance of not going to Erebor and find the mythical Gate that could lead her nieces back home, so, she decided to keep her close encounters with Kíli to herself until she felt it was safe.


The long expected night finally came, when the moon was a crescent bow, and fortunately at the same season the moon-letters on Thrór’s map were written. Thorin was summoned to Elrond not long after nightfall, and the Company would be to itself for a long time, along with elves who had Midsummer Eve as a long expected holiday.
Despite the long aged distrust among dwarves and elves as peoples, when some of them got the opportunity to get together as individuals, they behaved as any other people, looking for a chance of knowing each other, to share stories, to exchange information, curiosities, songs, habits, culture. So, when the one who had personal reasons to distrust elves was out of sight and the other dwarves, the hobbits and some of the younger elves in Rivendell found themselves together at one of the wide roofless halls of the Last Homely House, they naturally begun to chat, to tell jokes, laugh together, and so on. As it was a feasting day, it was easy that out of nowhere a barrel of wine appeared and begun to be shared among them. Soon some of them begun to sing, and some instruments popped up seemingly out of spontaneous generation.
The dwarves begun a joyous song, and some elves started to dance. But the song moved Lily strangely to dance in a different way the elves did, and she let her body move according to the feelings her body experienced, stamping her feet and clapping her hands, moving herself in circles. The elves left the dancing arena when perceived her different dancing stile and that the other dwarves cheered her up. Bofur’s flute sang wildly, every final note in the compass matching Bombur’s loudest beat on a drum one of the elves leant to him.
Iris and the half a dozen elves were quick to grasp the simple and repetitive, although joyous and heart filling dwarven song, clapping their hands to help the ever faster rhythm, and the cheering dwarves were helping Lily to swirl herself ever faster on herself and around the circle they formed. She was becoming dizzy for all the swirling, but was not able to stop. She knew if she tried to stop all of a sudden she would surely fall down, and although still being swirled her smile was gone and her eyes were wide in panic.
Then the song ended abruptly at the same time she felt strong arms embracing her and steadying herself off the expected fall. Lily could feel a strong chest behind her back and a heavy and deep breath before she heard his voice booming beside her ear.
“What do you think you are doing?” Lily thought for a moment that Thorin was mad at her, but he went on. “No surprise all of you, except for Glóin, who is not here at this mess, are a bunch of singles. This is not a courteous way to treat a lady.”
Some of the man shuffled, ashamed. It was not kind to be scolded by their leader in front of strangers, even strangers with whom they were sharing wine some minutes ago. Lily felt better for herself but guilty for the boys; it was not their fault alone. But on he went, not giving them time to apologize. His embrace got softer, his hands touched hers.
“When a dwarf woman dances, you must be respectful. Your place is not to make her spin wildly as a spinning top toy, but to guide her steps and assure her movements.” He made her turn around to face him with just one smooth movement. “Remember a dwarf woman is a Jewel Mahal gave us the honor to admire and to take care of. Do it wisely, even in the things you may think are lesser.”
His hand in hers made a subtle pressure as his leg moved to her side, prompting her body to move with his. Bombur’s drum beat once. Another step. Twice. A back step. Thrice. Fíli grabbed a violin an elf had been playing and joined in as soon as he perceived which dance Thorin was demanding, and smiled to himself, knowingly. He could be an enigma to most man, but he was his uncle, and he knew him well enough. It was more than pretending to teach his companions how to behave with a woman, it was to make clear to them that this was not a woman to be messed with, and to the strangers that he was kingly enough to shut up anybody’s mouth without being too obvious about it.
“A Jewel is born in the dark; you must do your best to bring her to where she will shine more, the light.”
He made her swirl around herself and around him, but it wasn’t dizzying her. His firm grasp on her hands guided and steadied her, as before, showing her face to all in the dancing arena, Bofur’s flute joining in.
“A Jewel is not meant to be kept hidden, all to yourself. A Jewell is to be shown proudly, for she is a blessing Mahal gave you.”
They danced side by side, her hands up and clapping as before as he guided her in a smooth movement of his hands on her arms, his hands then touching her hips and helping her to turn around.
“A Jewel may be rough sometimes, and you must have the determination to find her smoother side.”
In a series of hard steps, he managed to put her on the middle of the circle and to round her while she kept the rhythm with her heels. Iris found a way to match her voice to Bofur’s flute.
“A Jewel shines on herself, you only have the privilege to be lightened by her shine. Be grateful for this if you want to keep her at your side.”
And side by side they danced, one of his arms behind her back, his free hand reaching for her hand in front of them. Lily was amazed by the way he guided her body with unconspicuous touches of his hands and legs; she never danced so lightly before a dance she didn’t know beforehand.
“A Jewel must never be broken by you, for her shards will pierce your heart, and you will be like dead without her, but with her forever inside your heart.”
He turned her around to face him and moved her body with his while he was speaking, bringing her closer to his chest. With his last word the music stopped, the same moment he embraced her fully and held her eyes in his gaze. She could hear her own heart pounding in her chest and smell his warm breath close to her lips. He wasn’t smiling, but his eyes shone dangerously. She wished that moment could last forever.
The magic was broken by cheers and clapping hands around them. Thorin blinked and Lily understood they had been under the same spell. He let her go, reluctantly, and they looked around. Some more elves had gathered around while they were dancing, seemingly Elrond’s youngsters and Ellen. She was clapping her hands too, with a mocking smile at the corner of her mouth. Thorin eyebrows frowned.
“This was quite a demonstration, Lord Thorin.” Smiled at him Arwen, Elrond’s younger one. “Where I a dwarf lady, I’d be sure honored to be thought of as a jewel.”
Lily blushed. What seemingly begun as a scolding of the dwarf troop turned out to be a courting dance, and she didn’t know where to hide herself.
“Thank you, Lady Arwen, but it is duty for a king to command respect to his people and for an uncle to teach his nephews some manners.”
What? Was it just this for him, classes for Fíli and Kíli? Lily looked at him angrily. She still felt the warmth of his hands on her body, the smell of his breath so close to her lips, and he was just giving classes, out of duty?

"I´m shieldmaiden, and my hand is ungentle."